Fat Tuesday

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Fat Tuesday

Roman Catholic theologian Karl Rahner had this to say about Shrove Tuesday:

"Can the subject for our reflection for Shrove Tuesday be anything but laughter? We do not mean the sublime heavenly joy that is the fruit of the Holy Spirit, nor the joy that 'spiritual men' like to talk about in soft, gentle terms (a joy that can easily produce a somewhat insipid and sour effect, like the euphoria of a harmless, balanced, but essentially stunted person). No, we mean real laughter, resounding laughter, the kind that makes a man double over and slap his thigh, the kind that brings tears to the eyes [and milk from the nose]; the laughter that accompanies spicy jokes, the laughter that reflects the fact that man is no doubt somewhat childish and childlike. We mean the laughter that is not very pensive, the laughter that ceremonious people (passionately keen on their own dignity) righteously take amiss in themselves and in others. This is the laughter we mean. Is it possible for us to reflect on this laughter? Yes, indeed, very much so. Even laughable matters are very serious. Their seriousness, however, dawns only on the man who takes them for what they are: laughable." ("The Eternal Year," 49)

The rest of the chapter goes like this:
It's OK if this kind of laughter is not natural for you; don't worry about it.
Laughter reminds us of the constancy of change. We cannot achieve and should not desire a uniform state of mind through all the circumstances of life.
Sometimes it is good to laugh, but not all the time.
Laughter is unpredictable and acknowledges our createdness, and in so doing, acknowledges our Creator.
Present laughter points to the promis of future laughter - "Blessed are you who mourn and weep, for you shall laugh."

Below this post is an excerpt from Thomas Oden that goes along with Rahner's words.

I also wanted to give you a few things to laugh at before you lay your head on the pillow tonight.

1. Watch this.

2. Listen to this.

3. Read this.

4. Or, if you're an "Alice in Wonderland" kind of person, drink this.

Give the Lord a hand clap of praise and ...

Hack away.

Tom Oden on Theo-Comedy

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This is the postlude to Thomas Oden's "The Living God," the first of his three volume systematic theology.

Postlude: On Theo-Comic Perception

Finally we note the fundamental comedic contradiction that inheres in the study of God. It is the same contradiction that clings to human existence generally. For theology displays comedy since the seriousness of being human invites comedy.

God offers to humanity, along with other well-made gifts, the spirit of comic perception. It was not formally listed among the gifts of the Spirit because it is not formal and does not belong on a list. But the gifted in faith are seldom without it. It sees through sobriety to the unexpected reversal of human pride. It glimpses God's own delight in creation, and joy for humanity. It not only lightens the burden of human existence, which is especially desirable around decaying piles of theo-talk, it makes of the burden itself a certain delight.

We students of God, look at us: God's own image scratching our eczema; irritated by hemorrhoids, yet capable of the refracting divine goodness; biped animals who dream of eternity; playing God yet being bums, clowns, and louts—yet bums who can say from the heart, "God bless"; clowns who mime the posture of Superman; louts who can conceive of the idea of perfect being. We are curious about divine judgment, but a little less so than about the brakes on our car; recipi­ents of rationality who cannot balance our bank accounts; living souls puzzled by death. Such a creature it is who takes up pen and ink and scribbles vague sentences about God; who breathes polluted air and speaks of Spirit; who uses the name of God mostly to intensify curs­ing, yet who calls God the Adorner of creation.

It is because humanity is a paradox that the human study of God is and remains a paradox, strewn with blood and flowers, with pass­ing wind and singing hymns.

The manuscript of this book came to its last page, fittingly, on the feast day of Saint Lawrence, a deacon of the church of Rome martyred during the Valerian persecution of A.D. 258. The oral tradition holds that Lawrence was martyred by gridiron, and that after he had been "cooked" on one side, he said to his tormentors: "That side is done now, you can turn me over." The tradition that can laugh, not unsym­pathetically, at martyrdom, is surely healthier than one that can only bemoan inhumanities. Today is a fitting day to end this work, Saint Lawrence Day, August 10. I conclude with this respectful caveat in honor of Saint Lawrence:

One who leaves no room for the utter unseriousness of theology will not be taken seriously in speaking of God. Theology and comedy remain in closest proximity. For comedy views objectively the serious­ness of theology (Kierkegaard, Concl. Unsci. Post., pp. 46-55, 412 ff., 457 ff.). Comedy sees tragedy from the viewpoint of its resolution; hence comedy transcends tragic consciousness. This is why Kierke­gaard knew that humor was, of all stages of consciousness, the nearest to religious consciousness.

Without a sharp eye for theo-comedy, the grandeur and misery of the human story are mistaken; the joy and pain of God are missed. Only with the capacity for comedy does a greater capacity for tolerance grow. For egocentric temptations are always seeking to inflate the fantasy that one's own time-bound, parochial way of reasoning toward or from God is the only way. The healthier the study of God, the more candid it remains about its own finitude, the stubborn limits of its own knowing, its own charades, Band-Aids, closets, masks, and bro­ken windows.

That is why the study of God is best understood from within a caring community that laughs a little at its own somber efforts. Those whose faith offers corrective love empathically to others give a great gift. The gift is best wrapped in the brightly colored tissue of hope, in an atmosphere where theo-comic lightness about the pretended gravity of our words abounds.

How I Plan to Spend Lent 2006

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How I Plan to Spend Lent 2006

I am not going to go into all of my plans for Lent but I will mention a few things.

I read or heard somewhere that there is a Roman Catholic tradition of reading Dante’s Inferno and an Eastern Orthodox tradition of reading The Ladder of Divine Ascent by St. John Climacus during Lent. If this is unreliable info, feel free to let me know. Nevertheless, I will still go ahead with my plans. I will be reading Dorothy Sayers’s translation of Dante and Arch. Lazarus Moore’s translation of the Ladder of Divine Ascent, or as I like to call it, Stairway to Heaven. These works will assist me in penitence and self-examination.

I am also going back to a theme introduced to me by my theology professor, Dr. Bill Ury. What is the relationship of the Incarnation and the Atonement? I will be rereading TF Torrance’s Mediation of Christ. I will also at least look at some parts of Colin Gunton’s Actuality of Atonement. This line of inquiry may lead to some other reading. We’ll see.

In a continued effort to remedy my embarrassing ignorance of things Anglican, I plan to investigate some of the classical Anglican writers on Lent and Atonement: theological works, sermons, prayers, et al. I am primarily thinking of the Carolinian Divines and Tractarians but am open to others. Any suggestions?

There should be some new fiction on Poboy Muse during Lent, as well. I have some things cooking and the motivation to get them on the table. Let’s hope my motivation holds out.

I will be setting aside Fridays for more concentrated times of fasting, meditation and self-examination. I plan to follow the stations of the Cross out of the St. Augustine Prayer Book.

As to what I plan to give up for Lent, why sin, of course!

Hack away.

What Does Love Look Like, Anyway?

What Does Love Look Like, Anyway?
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Back when I was a Pentecostal I used to pass out a lot of tracts. I even wrote one. You can read a revised version of it here or here if you are interested. One of the tracts that we passed out was entitled "Born Again?" with the subtitle "Examine yourself." My friend Donald, whom I introduced to you last week, was in a public restroom and had an idea. He folded one of these tracts and inserted it in a condom machine so that the only part visible was "Examine Yourself."

I do not want to talk about condoms, public restrooms, tracts or my friend Donald today. I would like to begin with a word about the need for self-examination.

When I think about how both the pharisees and the disciples often opposed what Jesus did it reminds me of a phenomenon in my own life. I will look at the revisionists/ liberals/ reappraisers/ left and want to accuse them of missing the Lord. Then, realizing that I have no voice among the left, I will turn around and want to ask the conservatives/ traditionalists/ reasserters/ right about how they miss the Lord. As you can see, in so doing I have become all turned around.

I believe that hard questions need to be put to both those on the right and those on the left, as well as those (who think that they are) in the middle. I am somewhere on that spectrum. Therefore, I need to answer the hard questions, too.

"Love," as a concept, has fallen on hard times. Pop culture has ennervated it in the minds of an unfortunately large number of people. Our Christian culture is not very far ahead of the curve, if at all.

I was in Reston, LA in the Spring of 1995 at Louisiana Tech University. I went there with some friends to preach in the open air on the campus. One co-ed became so incensed with us that she began hysterically shouting over and over "GOD IS LOVE. LOVE NEVER FAILS." Now, there very well may have been plenty of reasons to take issue with our method and message. The problem, however, was not an absence of love, but a misaprehension by everyone there, including us evangelists, of how the divine love would be expressed by those who are called by God's name.

It is possible to be doctrinally pure and miss it. It is possible to work for social justice and miss it. It is possible to wax ever so eloquently on a blog and miss it.

When I want a soaring, philosophical treatise on love, Paul gives me a list of negative and positive characteristics that seem to have more to do with how I treat my roommate than the mystical transports that occur as I kneel at the altar to receive the Eucharist. In fact, it seems that the very problem Paul is seeking to correct is that his readers sought for the heights of worship and spirituality but did not have their feet planted in the Golden Rule.

Anyone who makes Paul an advocate for universally unquestioning acceptance and inclusivity is either ignorant or dishonest. Love is discriminating when it comes to sin and error. "Love does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth."

We must speak in the tongues of men. We must pursue knowledge. We must prophesy. All these things will continue to occupy an important place in the Church until we come to the Beatific Vision.

Jesus told the disciples what was going to happen to him. "And they understood none of these things: and this saying was hid from them, neither knew they the things which were spoken." Wow. That comes across as overkill to me. Okay, Okay, I get it. They didn't get it. That is like me reporting to you an incident in which a joke I told was not well received by saying, "They did not laugh and they failed to appreciate the humor, neither did a smile appear on their face." Right, Jason, your joke bombed.

The act of love, by which all other loves pale in comparison, was hidden from the eyes of the ones who were closest to Love Himself.

After the disciples miss Jesus' meaning about the crucifixion and resurrection, some other followers proceed to obstruct a needy man as he seeks the Lord's ministry. They do not understand what Jesus is up to but they know it's more important than pulling the car over to help a blind beggar, no matter how loud he is yelling for help.

It is easy for me to look at the 12 and the other disciples and marvel at how dense they were. Sometimes it is easy for me to look to the left and right and marvel at how dense you are. What is hard for me is to kneel down and try to discern what Love is up to right now. It is hard for me to discern my own heart. Sometimes it is because I do not understand. More often it is because I do not want to know.

And that, my friends, is a good way for me to spend the last few days before Lent begins on Wednesday, realizing that I am not the first one in the penitence line but I need to be. I do not know what God is doing. I don't understand it. I unwittingly oppose him. I fail to embody his love to those around me. For all my religious knowledge and talk and acts, I fall very far short of the 2 greatest commandments. And so we soon begin our season of introspection and repentance. So on Ash Wednesday begins the long march to Calvary.

"O LORD, who hast taught us that all our doings without charity are nothing worth; Send thy Holy Ghost, and pour into our hearts that most excellent gift of charity, the very bond of peace and of all virtues, without which whosoever liveth is counted dead before thee. Grant this for thine only Son Jesus Christ's sake. Amen."

This post is based on the readings for Quinquagesima. They can be found here.

Hack away.

Saint Matthias the Apostle Day

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Check out a cool picture of St. Matthias.

Read the collect, epistle and gospel.

O ALMIGHTY God, who into the place of the traitor Judas didst choose thy faithful servant Matthias to be of the number of the twelve Apostles; Grant that thy Church, being alway preserved from false Apostles, may be ordered and guided by faithful and true pastors; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

We need to pray this collect. How many false apostles are there, parading around, kissing Christ while betraying him at the same time? We need those true and faithful shepherds who will drive away all sin and error, as well as those who obstinately sin and err.

Hack away.

10 Things the Seminary I Graduated from Hopes I’ll Never Say

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1. “That’s right, Oprah, Dan Brown and I cowrote the sequel to 'The Davinci Code.'”

2. “For an offering of $25 or more I’ll send you this vial of anointing oil that I personally prayed over myself. Praise God.”

3. “Thus saith L. Ron.” (the founder of Scientology)

4. “Come on lucky 7. Preacher needs a new pair of shoes.”

5. “Would you like fries with that?”

6. “The space ship will be here tomorrow night. That’s why we need the 20 sets of matching track suits and Reeboks, Bilnork”

7. “I’ve only had one tonight, ociffer.”

8. “I’d like you to meet my new wife. Her name is Tatiana, uh, sorry, Paulina. Her English isn’t so good; she just arrived from Russia.”

9. “I now pronounce you man and man.”

10. “Please turn with me to the book of Lamentables,
the epistle to the Evasions,
the book of Ecclesiasticles,
the epistle to Filet Mignon,
the book of the Reparation, or
the prophet O-bla-di O-bla-da.”

Life goes on, bra’.
La-la-la-la life goes on.

Hack away.

Donald and Jason - Intro

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I need to start telling you some stories about my friend Donald. I wish you could know him. I have neither seen nor spoken to Donald in 5 years. Don't ask me why. I do not have a reason to give that is both honest and doesn't make me look like an incredibly poor friend.

You could never, and I mean never, find two people more oddly matched. There is no way we should ever have ended up as close friends but we did. If you saw us together you would have wondered what was up. On the surface it probably seemed like a reality TV show.

Donald grew up in Livingston Parish, LA. Livingston Parish is (locally) infamous for being home to a preponderance of outlaws. There is much hunting that is done there, in and out of season. Donald grew up as an outdoorsman and an outlaw.

I grew up in the suburbs, primarily outside of Atlanta. Sandy Springs is full of strip malls and luxury cars. There is much shopping and suburban angst that is done there. I grew up as an upper-middle class kid with a vicious case of apathy or alienation or whatever.

Donald is 6'6". He weighs over 300 lbs. He sports well-worn overalls and white rubber boots Monday-Saturday. His Sunday best is semi-worn overalls and black cowboy boots. He drove a beat up, loud, fast Chevy pick up.

I am a nutria's hair under 5'11". I never weighed more that 190 when I was around Donald. Most of the time I was a buck 65. I wore hiking pants and shirts from Eddie Bauer and hate getting dirty. I drove a Mitsubishi Eclipse.

Donald has huge, thick, shovel-like hands. Mine look more like they belong on an elf. Donald grew up hunting, fishing and making trouble. I grew up watching TV, playing rec league basketball and staying out of trouble.

I had a college degree, just finished a MDiv and hope to do PhD work. Donald barely finished high school but could easily fend for himself should civilization collapse. He has something that you will almost never find in suburbia. It is something I call "country boy sense." Don't you dare hear anything but respect in that term. If Y2K decides to come a decade late, I will be one of the first to go unless I can find Donald.

I offer these contrasts in order to set the stage so that the drama of our friendship might be more clearly presented in future posts. I am already having the emotional ups and downs of remembering a dear fellow pilgim and our time together. I hope that in reading of our adventures you are able to get at least a fraction of the enjoyment I had in living them.

Sexagesima - Keep Straight

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Read the collect, epistle and gospel.

I was introduced to a new way of giving directions at one point in my post-collegiate life. The one giving directions, after advising me of a turn, instructed me to "keep straight" at the following light. I was used to saying "go straight" at the light but understood what he meant. It sounded funny to me later when I repeated it to myself. Upon reflection it may actually be a more accurate way of describing what he wanted me to do. I think that this week's readings may be telling us to "keep straight." They may also be helping us to keep some things straight.

This is the second week in a row that the readings, when taken together, seem to me to be guarding us from perils on the left and right. On the one hand, we are not to trust in our own abilities. On the other, we see faith's need to be guarded by the good works of obedience.

The epistle has some words to say about what appears to be men who are religious oppressors. Paul contrasts himself to them. Rather than inflicting suffering on others, he bears it. Rather than buffeting others, he is beaten. Paul is a model shepherd for the flock of God. I also have some pointed words for religious oppressors and words of admonition for those who labor under the lash of such men. I will be sharing those words in the near future. I plan to post a 3-4 part series.

I think Paul's words may be boiled down to something Telly Savalas used to say when he was playing Kojak. "Who loves ya', baby?" Paul put his life on the line for those whom he led and taught. Nevertheless, sacrificial service can be used as a means of manipulation. There are leaders who will throw a guilt trip on people. The leader starts teaching something questionable or strays morally. Someone in the congregation calls him on it. Then the leader becomes indignant, cries "Foul!" and starts to talk about how much he has sacrificed for the people. This is a smokescreen. Paul laid down his life for the Church. He also faithfully fed the Church the truth and lived a holy life.

There is an easy flush that comes to some people when they hear the Gospel. Maybe they do not hear the part about bearing the cross themselves. Maybe they simply lose the truth amidst all the other stuff of life. Who knows? We do see from today's gospel that it takes attention, sincerity and perseverance to continue in the faith.

I play the part of the penitent today, for I am painfully aware of how easily I look like the rocky and thorny ground hearers. How often do I neglect to zealously guard the Word of God in my heart? I have failed to "give the more earnest heed to the things that I have heard, lest at any time I should let them slip" (Hebrews 2:1). However, as the song goes, "I heard the voice of Jesus say, 'Come unto me and live.'"

OK, that sounds nice and spiritual, right? But let's get down where it counts, shall we? For both our sakes, let's talk about how the parable of the sower might work out in our life all the time. I have in mind how we hear the readings and sermon on Sunday morning.

I have an advantage. I try to write about the readings every Sunday before church . I have already looked at them, thought about them, digested them a little and written about them before I ever enter the sanctuary. I find that to be very helpful when hearing the readings and listening to the sermon.

Most of you do not do that. Many of you do not attend liturgical churches, so you likely do not know what Scriptures will be read and preached. Sorry, I don't know what to tell you. For those of you who do, I would highly recommend familiarizing yourself with the readings sometime before the Sunday service. That is a small way to begin being more engaged in the worship of the Trinty.

What a blessing it is when we have faithful shepherds who lead us both by their lives and by their doctrine. Such men are unfortunately rare. Those of us who enjoy such green pastures should be ever thankful and should pray for those who do not, for they are many. May the Lord grant us strength to hear the Word with patience and bring forth fruit to perfection.

Keep straight and ...

Hack away.

Take a Field Trip to Purgatorio

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You must go visit Purgatorio. It is a website by Marc Heinrich. I repeatedly laughed out loud as I viewed his stuff. He concentrates on poking fun at some of the cheesy stuff perpetrated by Christians. Do yourself a favor, carve out at least 10 minutes (more if you can), and take a gander.

He has a great feature called "Separated at Birth." I will not try to explain why it is funny. You have to see it for yourself. Make sure to view all three pages.

So, go to Purgatorio, the website. It might increase the time you spend in Purgatorio, the place, but at least you'll have a smile on your face as the flames lick at your fanny.

Laugh away.

Septuagesima - A Good Time Was Had By All

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Read the collect, epistle and gospel.

I must admit that I am a bit stumped as to how to approach these readings but I’ll give it the old college try.

Well, the collect recognizes that indeed, we are punished for our offenses. We are not simply punished by some impersonal force, but, yes, Charlene, it is God who is doling out the punishment. “Offenses” is just another word for sins, one that emphasizes the fact that our sins are against other persons, human and divine. We take a beating for our sins, and rightly so. The collect turns from the reality of punishment to a plea for deliverance. This plea is based on God’s goodness.

OK, so far so good. But, I have a question. Is the collect, and by extension, the church who prays the collect, asking to be delivered from punishment or from the offenses that brought on that punishment? What do you think?

If we are simply delivered from punishment, then are we not going to end up right back in this situation again? Would it not be wiser to pray that God would deliver us from our offenses, that is, from our sins? Wouldn’t that make it less likely that we would end up taking a whuppin’ for the same thing next week?

Ah, there’s a thought. But, isn’t there a problem with that thought? I mean, we’re sinners, right? Through and through, in and out, from the soles of our head to the tops of our feet.

Or are we? Is that really the primary definition of what it means to be human, to be a sinner. Well, if you buy into the doctrine of “total depravity” then you accept such a definition of man. I would contend that the more universal, primary definition of man is that he is created in the image of God. Sin is an intrusion, a corruption, a sickness. The atonement seeks to remedy and heal that which is foreign to the nature of man.

I’m taking you on a bit of a ride today, aren’t I? I beg your indulgence. I’m sorry if you have somewhere more important or interesting to be right now. We’re not even to the epistle, yet! I’ll try to be a bit briefer.

Being delivered from our sins and the ensuing punishment will be helpful if we are to follow the Apostle Paul in running the marathon that is the life of faith and Christian service. We have work to do as ambassadors for Christ. We must be temperate and disciplined if we are to be successful and avoid becoming castaways. Oh, let’s not even step into those controversial waters today. That is, what exactly Paul was worried about. We might even get into a discussion about, oh no, “LOSING OUR SALVATION.” [cue ominous, dramatic music]

Finally, what in the world is Jesus talking about in today’s gospel reading? To be honest, I am not sure. I would have to consult with some Patristic authors to feel comfortable saying a whole lot about this parable. Is it about grace? Is it about rewards? Is it about salvation? Heaven? I’m not too sure. Boy, I don’t remember a Sunday since I began commenting on the readings that presented so much potential for argument and controversy regarding their meaning.

I think the key to understanding the parable comes at the end. “Is your eye evil because I am good?” Whatever the parable specifically addresses, we must be aware of the dangers of misjudging the actions of God. Sometimes we judge by a standard that God does not share. It is unfortunate, but often our ways are not God’s ways and our thoughts are not his thoughts. We must immerse ourselves in the life of the Church, the practice of prayer and the study of the Scriptures in order to conform our minds to the mind of God. It is an arduous process, but it is also a good and rewarding process.

Hack away.

Lent Season Archives

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Lent 2006

Septuagesima - A Good Time Was Had By All

Sexagesima - Keep Straight

Quinquagesima - What Does Love Look Like, Anyway?

How I Plan to Spend Lent 2006

Fat Tuesday

Super Friends Lenten Devotional Collaboration

Feelin' Dusty

Crazy Mo is Da Bomb

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See all the cartoons here. Get a T-shirt with the above image here.

Get Religion has plenty of coverage and links regarding the controversy surronding the Danish cartoons.

I know that there is debate among Christians about the appropriateness of writing or picturing things that are offensive to thoughtful, non-terrorist Muslims. That's fine by me. I tried to think through the issue and pay attention to some of the arguments against doing so before I decided to do this post.

Let me make a few things clear. Islam is a false religion. Allah is not God. Allah is an idol, a false god, a lie. Some people try to equate the God of the Old and New Testaments with the god of the Koran. Those people are misguided and mistaken, at best. Allah's attributes are not consistent with the attributes of the Christian God.

If, and when, Christian groups do unholy things, I expect there to be editorial cartoons that feature church buildings, crosses or other symbols of the Christian faith. These symbols indicate from where the offending groups mistakenly draw their inspiration. Muslims who desire peaceful dealings and respect from the West are going to have to get used to some rough handling.

Is it possible for Christians and Jews to live in the same country with Muslims without violence? Yes. Is it possible for us to do so while maintaining the right of each religion to criticize (and even make fun of) the others? Ask most Christians if they are able to restrain themselves from blowing buildings up, burning stuff, and killing people while living with people who make fun of their faith.

Hey, Muslims, protest away. Tell us why we shouldn't make images of Crazy Mo. I am happy to live in the same neighborhood, shop at the same stores and work at the same job as you do. But don't expect me to buy into your religion. I'm as confident about meeting the Blessed Virgin when I die as you are of meeting 70 virgins when you die. Furthermore, the dogmas of Islam are insulting to me, as I imagine that the Gospel is a stumbling block and an offense to you. That's life. I can deal with it. I hope that you can, as well.

Coffee Shop (mini) Rant

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I was in a local coffee shop last week and someone’s cell phone started ringing. It took long enough for the owner of the phone to answer for me to discern that it was a song from a television show that I have (thankfully) never seen and (hopefully) will never see. The only way you could get me to watch this show is if you pulled a Clockwork Orange re-education move, forced my eyelids open and put me in front of a screen so big that I could not help but see.

“What was the cell phone ring tone?” you ask. It was the theme from “Sex in the City.”

Now, I must confess that I also have a song as my ring tone. I know you’re dying to know what the axegrinder would choose to represent himself to the world when he gets a call.

Well, wonder no longer. It is “Mary, Mary, Why Ya Buggin’?” by old school rappers, Run DMC. I suppose that people might think I’m some kind of ghetto Roman Catholic who has a rosary in his back pocket. That has almost nothing to do with our poor, “Sex in the City” devotee at the coffee shop.

Nothing says, “I’m a whore” like having a ring tone from a show that celebrates unfettered sexual immorality. “Hey, everyone, I either have no self-esteem or no moral compass. I’ll let you guess which it is.” I’d like to reintroduce you to two words that have unfortunately fallen out of common usage: “licentious” and “lascivious.”

licentious - pursuing desires aggressively and selfishly, unchecked by morality, especially in sexual matters

lascivious - showing a desire for, or unseemly interest in, sex; provoking or exciting lust

I walked into the main room of my house that same night and sat down in front of the TV with my roommate. There was a Public Service Announcement on NBC during a show called “Las Vegas.” The speaker was a very attractive woman named Molly Sims. Molly was telling us to value ourselves on the inside more than we do on the outside. She wanted to make sure that we didn’t let anyone make us feel bad about our appearance, blah, blah, blah.

My inner black, Pentecostal preacher (Apostle, Bishop, Minister, Doctor, Reverend Lamont Robinson) had to speak up and say “That girl’s insides are probably dirtier than the men’s bathroom at an AC/DC concert. Help her, Jesus!” The irony of such a PSA playing during a show about Las Vegas should not be lost on even someone as clueless as Bill Maher.

It was kind of like the warning on the side of a pack of cigarettes. “We know that you are going to be influenced by the unreality of sin-without-consequences and the priority of beauty-at-any-price portrayed in our program to shape the way you interact with the world. We just wanted to wash our hands of our part in it by contradicting the entire bent of this show with a rootless, foundationless, substance-less PSA. Cheers.”

OK, what do I intend for you to take from this post, other than the fact that I am a self-righteous, judgmental know-it-all? I honestly do not know. I fear that I might be flirting with a common pattern of some bloggers: the rant for its own sake.

My favorite title for a blog that I have not been personally responsible for naming is the “Catholic Ragemonkey.” The authors of CR gave me a great explanation of a phenomenon that I have experienced in my own life. I encourage you to visit them and read it here.

[Update 2/15/05 - Peach Pettit told me the links to Catholic Ragemonkey do not work. I have checked them and do not understand why. The address is http://ragemonkey.blogspot.com/. If you copy and paste it into your address bar you will get there. The particular article can be reached by clicking on the "Why Ragemonkey" link in the sidebar.}

I do not want to rant for ranting’s sake. I do not find the practice to be particularly productive (though it can be fun). It does help to let off steam, but I’m not sure how edifying it is to do so publicly.

So, if nothing else, I will take this opportunity to pray to the Father of lights, in whom is no shadow or turning, that he would allow the light of the world, his Son Jesus Christ, to shine in the hearts of all his children by the Holy Spirit to the end that people like the girl in the coffee shop and the woman on the TV would be draw to the City of God and the holy, self-giving love that rules there. We are not meant for the kind of “Sex in the City” that is found in places like “Las Vegas.”

Hack away.

Postscript:

A friend of mine was back in the aforementioned coffee shop last Friday. A couple was sitting on the adjoining couch next to my friend. This couple starts making out on the couch. Not politely pecking each other on the cheek. MAKING OUT. Panting, groping, etc. I know, weird.

The problem is, it got weirder.

The guy and gal never really disentangled themselves. The guy breaks out a book and starts reading the passage in 1 Corinthians about the Lord’s Supper. How do I know what he was reading? Because he was reading it out loud. Huh?

I’m serious. I have no reason to doubt the truthfulness or perception abilities of my friend. The guy is reading about the Communion and he continues to make out with his lady friend while he is reading the Bible out loud.

When he got to the part about eating the bread unworthily, profaning the body of the Lord and bringing judgment on oneself they appeared to get uncomfortable and quit. I kind of wish I had been there. I’m kind of glad I wasn’t.

There was really less of a point to that than to the other events recounted earlier in this post. It was simply too weird to not pass on to you.

Epiphany Season Archives

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Epiphany 2006

Epiphany - Christ (Unexpectedly) Revealed

Christ's Baptism - Truth, Beauty & Goodness

Joyous Diversity

St Anthony of the Desert

The Confession of St. Peter

Epiphany 3 - Hey, Batter, Batter, Batter ... Saaa-wing, Batter!

The Conversion of St. Paul and the Rest of Us

Epiphany 4 - Can I Please Speak to the Manager?

The Presentation of Christ in the Temple

St. Cornelius the Centurion Day

Epiphany 5 - Elect in the Barn

Epiphany 5 - Elect in the Barn

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Read the collect, epistle and gospel.
Here is John Chrysostom's homily on Matthew 13:24-30.

Ah, where to begin?

Paul is not one to screw around, ever. If he's talking, it is important. If he's giving you theology, it is going to stretch your brain until it feels like a rubber band about to snap. If he's exhorting you, it's going to show you the most noble way to live in the here and now.

What about Jesus? Man, he communicated very differently than Paul. Today's gospel reading hangs some very difficult concepts out there. Yet, the language is as simple as you will find. I mean, he talks about farming and the problem of weeds, for goodness sake.

I used to major on "discernment." Now, I maintain that Christian discernment is woefully rare. I know that we need people in the Church who are theologically and morally discerning. We need to be able to dell the difference between good and evil, right and wrong, truth and error. In a former life, I overdid it quite a bit. My desire was to attend to these vital concerns. I simply lacked the maturity and the equipment to do so without making a mess.

It seems that the juxtaposition of today's readings point to telling the difference between the counterfeit and the genuine when it comes to Christianity. On one hand we have Paul describing what the elect of God should look like: holy, compassionate, kind, humble, meek, patient with others and their circumstances, forgiving, full of love, peaceful, unified, thankful, obedient to the Gospel, wise, instructing one another, joyful, focused on Jesus.

In the gospel reading we learn that, alongside the good wheat, there will be weeds (tares) in the field that is the Kingdom of heaven. There are a lot of exegetical issues here that end up informing or deforming some of our ideas about church discipline, excommunication, heresy, apostasy and the like. I simply want to point out that there are bad folks and good folks living side by side in the world and possibly in the Church.

I can say this, I want to end up in the barn and not the fire. I think Paul gives us a full helping of direction as to how that kind of desire can be realized. Each characteristic of the elect that he lists deserves its own sermon. I love how he gives the words flesh and blood. "You want to know how to act like the elect? If you've got something against someone, forgive him just like Christ forgave you. Teach one another. Be patient with each other." It's enough to give me plenty on which to

Hack away.

O LORD, we beseech thee to keep thy Church and household continually in thy true religion; that they who do lean only upon the hope of thy heavenly grace may evermore be defended by thy mighty power; through Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

St. Cornelius the Centurion Day

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Read the collect, epistle and gospel.

I have great affection and admiration for Cornelius the Centurion. The epistle reading is from Acts 11. That passage is really the fallout from and commentary on the actual narrative. To get the whole story you need to read chapter 10.

Peter gradually embraces the gentiles' place in the Kingdom of God. He is hesitant at first. I am glad that Luke put that part in the Bible. it was not easy for Peter to take that step. It took a vision, a divine command and a corresponding visit from some gentiles begging for Peter to come with them to get him out the door.

Paul seemed to warm to a mission to the gentiles more quickly. Maybe it was because of how virulently he fought against the Church prior to the Damascus Road. I think I can understand that. He had to be thinking, "I am certainly the unworthiest wretch who ever lived. How could I possibly begrudge anyone else a place at the table?"

The worst thing Peter ever did was deny the Lord. He and Jesus got that straightened out after the resurrection. But how do you make up for killing and imprisoning the people you end up leading? You can't. Paul simply had to live with it.

It's not like everywhere he went people were saying, "Don't sweat it, Pablo, it's cool." Barnabas got him in the door. Who knows how long it was before Paul quit feeling like people were whispering behind his back. "Yeah, that's him. That's the guy who killed Stephen and all the others. That's the guy who put Uncle Jonathan in the slammer."

What in the world does that have to do with Cornelius? Well, if Paul went to Cornelius's house it would have had a different effect than Peter going. Peter had been in the Church from the beginning. Peter was the man. Paul was johnny-come-lately. If he tried some radical new innovation, like bringing the gentiles into the Church, people might have been much more resistant. The fact that Peter was the first apostle that went to the Gentiles seems to have made something that was very difficult a little easier.

I look up to Cornelius. He took what little he knew about God and worked with it. He did what he could with what he had. He aggressively sought for more. God blessed him.

When I knew very little about God and the Church the Lord gave me a consuming desire to be close to him and his people. This May will mark the 15th year since I was baptized. I have been down a number of different roads as I have sought to follow the Lord.

He has been faithful to lead me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake. He has rescued me when I have taken wrong turns (and I took at least one that was a doozy!). The icon of the Good Shepherd is one of my favorites. It hangs in a prominent place in my bedroom.

May we be reminded today of the goodness of the Lord as he ever seeks to draw all mankind to himself. May we be like Cornelius in obeying every bit of truth that shines into our hearts. May the Father's good pleasure of adoption be accomplished in the Son's perfect work of reconciliation by the Spirit's comforting ministry of divinization.

Hack away.

The Presentation of Christ in the Temple

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Read the collect, epistle and gospel.

Have you ever been struck by the violence of the language that surrounds the coming of Christ? The epistle reading for today comes from Malachi 3 and features such language.

"Who can abide ... who can stand when he comes? He is like a refiner's fire. He shall purify and purge. I will come near to you in judgment. I will swiftly witness against [all the bad guys]."

I'm trying to come up with an image that further illustrates what's going on here. Maybe a bully is beating up one of the weaker kids at school. The bully has been warned in the past and chosen to ignore the warnings. The bully had his chance to reform. No mas. Out of nowhere a linebacker from the football team rounds the corner behind the gym and levels the bully. Problem solved. The physics club rejoices. I don't know. Maybe that works, maybe not.

I get the feeling from Malachi that things were screwed up at the top among God's people. Therefore, bad guys had the run of the land. There were some people, however, who were looking for God, who delighted in what they knew of him. For those people the Lord came. For people like Simeon and Anna. For people like Mary and Joseph.

He comes to secure a righteous offering, deliver his people from the oppression of evil and restore the fear of the Lord.

The connection of the Malachi passage with the presentation in the Temple is awesome. The little baby who is borne by his parents will bear their sins. The baby who is presented with a sacrifice will present himself as the perfect sacrifice. The baby who is blessed by the priest will be the Great High Priest who will bless all people for all times and establish a holy priesthood in his own name. This child, who is God himself, purifies the Temple with his presence.

ALMIGHTY and everliving God, we humbly beseech thy Majesty, that, as thy only-begotten Son was this day presented in the temple in substance of our flesh, so we may be presented unto thee with pure and clean hearts, by the same thy Son Jesus Christ our Lord. Amen.

Hack away.

Longwood Gardens, PA Pix

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I visited Longwood Gardens when I was in PA over Chrismas. Here are a few pictures.